The Shins - Fighting in a Sack

So I decided to throw together lyrics for one of my NFL song parody ideas. So to help encourage the Jaguars’ defense, which currently has an abysmal 5 sacks on the season, here’s “Fighting for a Sack”:

Just last week I woke from some unconscionable game
And was pancaked to my back once again
To keep this team afloat
There are ends we can’t afford to keep
Oh I miss Marcus Stroud so much

But you’ll find those lingering tackles
Are just your GM’s attempt to make it all cheap and nice
And make a moron out of you
Walking a bridge with weakening cables
Huddled up in fear and hate because we know our fate
And it’s a lot to put us through.

Most linemen turn to dust
As there are few in which we all can trust
Haven’t you noticed they’ve been shedding tackles left and right?
So let’s abandon that track
And leave our linemen fighting for a sack
Cause we are way too inexperienced for that.

You might find some rookies on our depth chart
Learning the latest changes to the book
Of our plays in an attempt to penetrate
Marionettes on weakening cables
Huddled up with fear and hate
Because they know their fate and it’s a lot to put them through.

We’ve taken on a climb
And it’s long enough to put the best of us on our backs
Walking up a slide
And there are those we know who’d have us five games off the lead.

But you’ll find those lingering tackles
Are just your GM’s attempt to make it all cheap and nice
And make a moron out of you
Crossing the brindge on weakening cables
Huddled up with fear and hate because we know our fate
And it’s a lot to put us through