I don’t think hiking with House would go as well.
I feel like such a lazy bastard for not doing anything outside on my days off even though it’s been beautiful weather. So tomorrow, I promise I’m going to go for a hike or something… with the president.
You rear ended my VW with your Honda. You had no insurance, and said you “couldn’t afford this” You asked if we could settle this with sex, then gave me a bj in my backseat in the middle of the day.
I really wish I knew your name! I’ve been thinking about you ever since and I want to fuck you senseless RIGHT NOW
“
| — |
A missed connection! (via illustratedexample) I don’t think that’s technically “missed.” Sounds like they connected at some point. |
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
The Shins - Fighting in a Sack
So I decided to throw together lyrics for one of my NFL song parody ideas. So to help encourage the Jaguars’ defense, which currently has an abysmal 5 sacks on the season, here’s “Fighting for a Sack”:
Just last week I woke from some unconscionable game
And was pancaked to my back once again
To keep this team afloat
There are ends we can’t afford to keep
Oh I miss Marcus Stroud so much
But you’ll find those lingering tackles
Are just your GM’s attempt to make it all cheap and nice
And make a moron out of you
Walking a bridge with weakening cables
Huddled up in fear and hate because we know our fate
And it’s a lot to put us through.
Most linemen turn to dust
As there are few in which we all can trust
Haven’t you noticed they’ve been shedding tackles left and right?
So let’s abandon that track
And leave our linemen fighting for a sack
Cause we are way too inexperienced for that.
You might find some rookies on our depth chart
Learning the latest changes to the book
Of our plays in an attempt to penetrate
Marionettes on weakening cables
Huddled up with fear and hate
Because they know their fate and it’s a lot to put them through.
We’ve taken on a climb
And it’s long enough to put the best of us on our backs
Walking up a slide
And there are those we know who’d have us five games off the lead.
But you’ll find those lingering tackles
Are just your GM’s attempt to make it all cheap and nice
And make a moron out of you
Crossing the brindge on weakening cables
Huddled up with fear and hate because we know our fate
And it’s a lot to put us through
Well, here’s one good reason to support Iowa the rest of the way…
No, Iowa can lose. Let’s see a Cincinnati/Boise State Championship, that’ll teach ‘em.
I guess the basic premise of this article is interesting, but when you think about it, the reasoning is idiotic.
“The best thing that can happen to doom a bowl system is mayhem, and that’s what we’d get with an Iowa and TCU title game.”
I’m not sure what dictionary the author is using, but I don’t think two undefeated teams teams playing in the national championship would be “mayhem.” It may not be “sexy” or “appealing” to most of America, but it sure as hell isn’t “mayhem.” Mayhem would be a 12-1 team playing another 12-1 team while an undefeated team gets passed over as well as another 11-1 team who beat one of those 12-1 teams and an 11-1 team that beat the passed-over 11-1 team gets left out of the BCS completely (sound familiar?).
Sure, Iowa-TCU wouldn’t get the ratings a Florida-Texas or Alabama-Texas would get, but if they both finish undefeated (a big IF) and there aren’t any other deserving undefeated teams, there would be no argument that they aren’t the two most deserving teams. Which has been the argument against the BCS to begin with. So, first you were against the BCS because it wasn’t fair to deserving teams and now you’re going to be against them because you didn’t get the dream matchup you wanted in the BCS title game because they picked the more deserving teams? Solid argument.
Basically, his thesis seems to be “all college football cares about is money, so a not-as-profitable championship game would cause them scrap the BCS in hopes of making more money.” Which is absolutely retarded. First of all, if Iowa-TCU were the title game, you would still get a Florida/Alabama-Texas matchup in the one of the other BCS games. Second, and more importantly, any other system in place wouldn’t ever prevent this from happening more than the BCS already does. If anything, a playoff system would be more prone to un-sexy matchups.
All of this is rampant speculation, of course. Here’s my suggestion: Let the season play out, then start suggesting ways to fix the BCS.
Since I seem to have a superhuman ability to affect the NFL with my song parody ideas...
I have decided to use my powers for good instead of evil:
For Cleveland fans, The Thermals kindly suggest that you abandon your anemic pass offense altogether and go “Back To The T”
For the Jacksonville Jaguars defense, The Shins encourage you to keep on “Fighting for a Sack”
To NFL punters, The Faint suggests you forgo the fake and continue to “Drop Kick the Punts”
Why's everybody making a big deal about this Maine thing?
I mean, who cares what some Canadian province decides about gay marriage?
One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o’clock.
This is a dumblaw for my good ol’ city of Riverside.
You know damn well what I’m doing tomorrow.
Well, in my old college town of Champaign, IL, it is illegal to pee in your neighbor’s mouth.
That’s not illegal everywhere?! BRB visiting my neighbor.
Edit: the only good one for Colorado was “The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park.” The rest were actually pretty reasonable.
